I’m a lonely father right now. Melanie suffered another serious Gallstone attack on Sunday afternoon, and I had to rush her to the hospital. She’s now been in for two nights now, and I still have no word as to whether or not they will be removing her Gall Bladder. When I visited her today on my way home from work, she indicated to me that she was going to be scoped this evening, but has since not yet called me with the final word…it’s stressing me out.
Thank god for my inlaws…Doris and Stefan have been watching Nathaniel whenever I need them…whether it was for the trip to the hospital, or for when I have to go to work. I would love to take time off again, but I just can’t do that right now. Thankfully, my boss has been very supportive of my time lately…I was late coming in today due to the fact I was at the hospital until almost 1:30am and Stefan couldn’t arrive until 9am this morning, and tomorrow he can’t be here until around 11am. It helps a lot to not feel pressure on that side…I certainly don’t need anymore stress. However, taking full days off right now will just cause further problems in the workplace. I don’t feel that my job is threatened, but there’s only so much time you can take off in a calendar year without being bitch-slapped.
The sensation of feeling totally helpless is absolutely horrifying. When Melanie began to suffer the pains, I did all I could to ease her through it, but there is very little I can do. My one attempt to make her a homeopathic remedy that I researched had quite the opposite effect (and a very unpleasant one too for all of us too) than I anticipated, and I was pulled between mopping up the mess (thank god I have a strong stomach), comforting her and ensuring that Nathaniel was ok. I find I don’t multi-task well these days, and my stress level raises accordingly whenever put in those situations.
So, I am home alone with Nathaniel, and missing my wife a lot. Nathaniel waswide awake for the entire evening, and I got him to sleep around 11. I figure he’ll have me up at least once during the night…so I’d better catch some sleep now to get my strength up. I’ll post more soon.